Mindhunter by John E. Douglas & Mark Olshaker

 

FBI Special Agent and expert in criminal profiling and behavioural science, John Douglas, is a man who has looked evil in the eye and made a vocation of understanding it. Now retired, Douglas can let us inside the FBI elite serial crime unit and into the disturbed minds of some of the most savage serial killers in the world.

The man who was the inspiration for Special Agent Jack Crawford in The Silence of the Lambs and who lent the film's makers his expertise explains how he invented and established the practice of criminal profiling; what it was like to submerge himself mentally in the world of serial killers to the point of 'becoming' both perpetrator and victim; and individual case histories including those of Jeffrey Dahmer, Charles Manson, Ted Bundy and the Atlanta child murders.

With the fierce page-turning power of a bestselling novel, yet terrifyingly true, Mindhunter is a true crime classic.

Just My Thoughts

Winston Is A Champ

Original Post

Following is Update #2 - About 2 weeks ago 

You know what one of the biggest lessons I've learnt since beginning treatment for PTSD? Not everyone is an arsehole! Most people seem to be wonderful and kind. I say seem because this is a generalisation and I haven't met everyone in the world. I'm also still messed up by years of trauma and my go-to trauma brain thinks everyone is a prick and untrustworthy.

I say this because it amazes me every day and I'm so grateful now. Ridiculously so. If it wasn't pandemic times I think I might hug people when before I could barely make eye contact. Crazy!

So the original vet hospital I took Winston to were amazing. Even though I was triggered and losing my shit for not being able to administer an injection, they were amazing. So professional, sympathetic, and all-round wonderful.

Then my local vet, not an exotics vet by the way, have been wonderful too. I was able to arrange with them to bring Winston over for his daily injection without a consultation which would have really f'ed me up financially (what finances though? LOL). Even better is they are a block away and within my 5km radius (I'm in a covid-19 red zone at the moment).

First Dose Done

 That's right. I've had my first dose of covid-19 vaccine. Yay! I'm quite pleased about it so obviously I am very pro-vaccines and pro-vaccine education. I wholeheartedly believe everyone should get vaccinated, voluntarily, and as soon as it is available for them. 

I got the Pfizer vaccine. I'm eligible, here in Australia, even though I am under 40 because I have Type 1 Diabetes. Add on to that my history with clotting and my clotting gene mutation and it definitely rules out AstraZeneca. I would have applied for the AstraZeneca if it wasn't for all my clotting issues and even went to my GP as soon as it was available, but I'll probably post about the whys another time. 

For those Sydney-siders waiting to get their first dose done I though I'd share my experience with you. 

I won't get into the applying process as we're all experiencing a fun time with that. I booked my appointments and had a two month wait for the hub at Sydney Olympic Park.

The vaccination process itself was quite smooth. When I went, unfortunately, they had a big ol' technical glitch. Their system crashed. It was so unfortunate given Wednesday was so cold! It meant they were running 1.5 - 2 hours behind. My appointment was 5:15pm and they were still at 3:45pm when I showed up. Early. Of course. Before 5pm.

Crochet: Red and Brown Oma Blanket

 I've finished the first project in my crochet challenge! Let's get one thing out of the way first before I go on. To me, a granny square blanket will always be an Oma blanket. It's what I grew up with. Granted my Oma did more than granny square so therefore all her blankets, as well as her granny square blankets, are called Oma blankets. This includes the ripple stitch blanket we currently have on the couch. It's mostly for me a granny square blanket in its finished stage is an Oma blanket. Calling it such is a hard thing to shake.

Anyway!

My Red and Brown Oma Blanket

Description

This blanket has turned into a multi-toned, mainly deep brown and red, chunky granny square throw. 

Hook Size and Yarn

Hook: 5.75MM or J/10 Yarn: With this project I combined three different yarns. I found two in the yarn bin at Spotlight. #1 was a soft, red, and chunky yarn. #2 was multi-toned in browns, black, and white. #3 was Lion Brand's Heartland Thick and Quick in Sequoia. 

Catching Up II

 So it's May....

I was just checking what I posted last and realised my last post was March. What have I been doing in all that time? April felt like it was about four days long. Easter happened, therapy, more painting, plans for the future, Dune, and crochet.

I went to the Easter Show. Let's start there seeing as I went the first weekend after it opened and that's pretty much in the beginning of April. I was really excited about the Easter Show. I was more excited about it than I was about Mardi Gras which is saying something. Gay Christmas and all.

I hadn't been in a few years, I think. I was going to say I haven't been since I was 14, but I feel like I've gone as an adult and possibly repressed it... Either that or I went with someone I'm not fond of anymore. Either way - REPRESSED.

Basically I was excited because it was an event I could actually participate in and I haven't been post-PTSD-treatment. I may be midst treatment, but there's been so much progress. I want to try out things with my fresher level of awareness and with my grounding techniques in place. The Easter Show is also where I remember going to as a kid and watching the parade, but blocking it from my memory. Everything else around the parade I remember, including the large frog hat I wore and being on my father's shoulders, but the parade? Apparently fuck the parade. I didn't see it this time 'round either. I forgot about it.

I didn't flip out and enjoyed myself. I dissociated at times, but not all day. I even went on a ride, The Pirate's Revenge, and didn't hate it. I've now figured out heights can be scary, but it's more the vertigo I get and then the motion sickness from movement. I'll probably not go on a roller coaster, but I will consider more rides.

What else?

Mardi Gras 2021

 I went to the 2021 Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras last Saturday. I go almost every year. It's Gay Christmas after all. It's a huge special event in the queer community. Usually I don't watch the parade though. I dress up, paint my face, and go clubbing with my friends. We have pre-drinks and then we head into the city and dance all night. Well my friends and partner dance all night. I start dancing, then space out, and end up going outside to make friends with total strangers. All the while spacing out hardcore. It took me awhile to realise there were certain triggers cropping up when I was out clubbing. I'm still trying to figure out the need to leave my group of friends, go outside, and socialise, but I'll get there.

There are several reasons why I don't usually watch the parade. Given Mardi Gras is a popular event of course you're going to have to get there early to grab a good spot for viewing. I don't like being hemmed in, touched and pushed, exposed to smells which will set off my allergies, and these are all things which happen during the parade. I realised recently the other thing I don't like about parades aren't the parades themselves, but the sensory stimulation. There's a lot going on. There's a great deal of noise. It puts me on edge.